Firstly may we send you our Warmest Christmas Wishes to you.

Having lost my baby Son Joseph, whom would now be 6 years old, there are days that are still filled with great sadness. My imagination of his loving soul and personality fill my days in wonder. The scan images and photos are all that I have of him. Having felt his movements and seen his joy and excitement as he kicked, punched and waved on the screen, I am still left without him holding my hand as I walk down the street. He now walks with me as an artist image of his footprint tattooed on my skin and his photo held in my purse.

My heart is still numb and living without him can be lonely. Christmas is around the corner, and my Son should be high on life with the magic of the Season and Santa on his way. The sound of his voice, giggles and his inherited Mother’s unfortunate singing voice  Screeching “Little Donkey” should be echoing and filling the room. Instead there is an empty seat where he should be sat.

Initially losing my Son Joseph at 23 weeks felt a great injustice being called a Late Miscarriage. Reporters write of him as a Still Born – if only that was the correct term. For this, he would have a trace as being my Son on our Family Tree. He would be a legal acknowledgment of my existence. Instead he has a medical phrase label and has become a term “miscarriage”. A harsh word that many who walk amongst us think is insignificant and wasn’t meant to be.  A society deeply unaware of the aftermath of devastation and grief families are carrying around for the rest of their lives.  Joseph James Collier was a life, he was a beautiful formed baby held tight surrounded by tears and love. He was a Son that his Father and I created. 

A change has been made to our objectives:

 

As the days and years have passed, we have learnt that many are facing the same emotions from the loss of their baby pre 24 weeks gestation and not just from 14 – 24weeks.

The struggles and stories are all different, but the same at the same time. More in the community are affected by the loss of their baby. With this in mind we changed our obejectives from Late Miscarriage to all miscarriage – Pre 24 weeks. This came into affect from 29th November 2024, 5 years on from when we were registered as a charity. 

Within these 5 years, Businesses and Charities have seen the consequences of the Covid pandemic and the High Cost of Living Crisis. We ourselves have ran the course of this as well as ill health from the Founding Trustee. (Which he now has come on leaps on bounds). The other has just lost all of her hair, but on reflection there is no wonder!

We have been working hard in the background trying to find the Spot for Rest With Joseph and Friends to come into its own. Plots have been found, but then have fallen through. Some days the World seems to be out there to stop us – Why, I don’t know? For we are not doing anything that cannot be achieved. It has been a journey full of obstacles and set backs. But through each wall we have met, we have climbed and gained trust with Planning Consultants, Landscape Architects and Legal acquaintances. With the Yo-Yo of our events and the money we have accumulated from your help, we have thought and created our Concept Design for our Burial and Memorial Garden. An Angelic plan for our loved ones to lay to rest and/or be remembered in.

2024 is supposed to be a time when you can talk about anything, yet the Baby Loss Community is still kept in the shadows. Society feels awkward in bringing it up. They dont know what to say or how to react.  The Big Baby Loss charities have worked incredibly hard and give valuable work to those affected. But not everyone wants the help of Counselling. I didn’t. I wanted a place my Baby would be recognised. I wanted him to belong. I want people to know he was here. I wanted a place I felt connected to him. I wanted a place where I never felt I was walking the street in isolation and loneliness.  I wanted to find peace. He and the other Miscarriage Babies deserve that and so do their families.

We believe we need to enhance what is available, not replace or change it. The Baby Loss movement still needs a good shake up and brought into the forefront. We are asking for a couple of acres in a County with many to spare. These acres will be a small area, but create a big heart and embracing hug to the Sons and Daughters lost.

Our landscaped garden will give a permanent place to lay to rest Joseph and his friends (all the other sons and daughters lost to other families) and or to be be remembered. A tranquil garden where Families can gain comfort and have a safe space to grieve, reflect and come united together as a family. A healing space where they are not isolated from society and where they can gain the emotional support of others . A place the whole family can be brought back together in a natural healing environment.